Wednesday, 20 August 2014

Ignoble Truths

Like most religious practices, reincarnation doesn’t work unless you truly believe in it. Humanity is special, as unlikely as that may seem at times, and if they believed in something, that would change reality.

And the reality this time was at a turning point. The coming years would be challenging, and it needed a leader for the faithful with just the right mix of intelligence, charisma and faith. Luckily, just as the last leader was dying, such a young boy was being born, and he’d secure their faith for generations.

Shame that the doctor pulled the other twin out first.

Tuesday, 19 August 2014

Aesop 2.0: 13. The Minnow and The Sardine

The Minnow has spent his entire life this body of water, only a few body lengths wide and not much longer, and shallow. It was the world, and the Minnow was happy, and never listened to the Sardine, that spoke of a world outside the edge of the water. Then one day the world grew as more and more water came from above, and soon the world seemed to go on forever. The Sardine swam away, but the Minnow stayed put, and stayed until the World dried all away.

“Don’t expect miracles, but if one occurs, don’t ignore it either.”

Monday, 18 August 2014

A Prince Frog

She wanted a prince.

But she knew that you didn’t just find a prince on a street corner. Princes didn’t grow on trees. No, if she wanted to find her royal, she’d have to kiss an awful lot of frogs.

So she closed her eyes and dived in. She left no frog unkissed, since she knew that any of one them could be the prince…

So many weren’t though.

But eventually, she found him. The diamond in the rough, the rose in the thorns, the prince among the frogs.

Shame that all those frogs had given her warts by then.

Sunday, 17 August 2014

Overcoming The First Step

“Call me Alpha Male.”

“Whatever you want baby.” replied the hooker.

No no, that’s silly.

Mother dyed her clothes today.

Who cares about that?

It was a pleasure to turn left at the highway.

This isn’t a road trip kinda book!

The past is an airport lounge, they overcharge things there.

… No, I don’t think so.

It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single man in pursuit of a runaway fugitive must be in want for a helicopter.

Not bad, not bad, but this is meant to be a thriller…

It was a stark and dormant night.


Saturday, 16 August 2014


It’s really no surprise that teenagers rebel against the world.

Think about it, they spend their entire lives up to that point being told that the princess will save them, or that there’s a prince to rescue, and that happily ever afters are the norm.

Then they grow up. And the Real World just says ‘NOPE!’

They find out that reality is a long, dull, repetitive slog with no royalty to speak of, so get to work.

Then they really grow up, hopefully. And they learn that it’s not about the crowns in victory, it’s about the journey forever towards...

Friday, 15 August 2014

Sheriff For Our Future

He really left an impression.

Most teachers tended to fade from memory, either because they follow the guidelines to the letter, or because they just flat out suck and get reassigned quickly. This class was not one that handled even the slightest hint of fear. Not that we set out to ruin them, well some of us… OK, we’re jerks. But it’s fun man!

Of course, when he came in, all guns blazing, that was different. All the talk of respect and stuff, right up til Sal threw him headfirst at the wall.

Like I said, he left an impression.

Thursday, 14 August 2014

Dear In The Headlights

Once the dead began to rise again, we headed out to the country.

I had just taken the wheel when out of the darkness a deer jumped in front of us and slammed into the fender.

“Stay here.” I told her, but she got out anyway, muttering something about the bathroom.

I focused on getting the carcass out from where it had stuck when a Zed lunged at me. I re-killed it with my crowbar. I called out for Sally, and she, or rather it, came out of the bushes.

I ended up with more than deer in the headlights.